What To Expect in a Sex Abuse Case: Questions and Answers
Key Takeaways:
- The decision to file a sex abuse case can be frightening and overwhelming
- Sex abuse survivors often have many questions about how these cases work and what’s involved
- Having answers to these questions can help survivors decide whether or not to move forward with a sex abuse case
- The right legal team should let you set the pace, make your own choices about how to proceed, and offer you compassionate support throughout the process
Taking the courageous step to pursue legal action after experiencing sexual abuse is deeply personal and it’s only natural to feel uncertain, scared, or overwhelmed at the prospect. Many survivors share the same concerns and you are not alone in wondering what lies ahead.
Below are our answers to some questions you might have as you seek justice for the trauma inflicted on you. Keep in mind that these answers are based on the way we, at Shepard O’Donnell, handle sex abuse cases and may not be the same for all law firms.
- What does it mean to seek “justice”? Justice means different things to different people. For some, it’s not about money, but more about accountability, like an admission of wrongdoing or changes at an institution to prevent future harm. For others, financial compensation plays a role in helping them rebuild their lives. From the very beginning, we will work with you to uncover what justice means for you. The answer helps us shape the path forward in a way that is most meaningful to you.
- What will our initial meeting be like? The first meeting is about getting to know each other. We’ll share how we approach cases, and you’ll have space to share your thoughts, questions, and concerns. When you feel comfortable, we’ll talk briefly about the abuse and help you understand the ways in which it has impacted your life. Some people are surprised at the various ways past trauma has shaped who they are today. We work hard to create a safe environment in which to open up, either in our office or in your own home. At this time, we will also talk about boundaries, whether that includes avoiding certain topics you’d rather not discuss, or not leaving messages on a home phone, we’ll respect your wishes. Our goal is to help you feel secure at every step.
- Will I have someone to support me through the process? You don’t have to go through this alone. Our attorneys are committed to being as accessible as possible, and you’ll also have direct access to our dedicated, in-house victim advocate, who is available by phone or text whenever you need. Their role is to provide a safe, nonjudgmental space where you can begin to process what’s happened, help you understand your rights, and make sure you feel empowered and informed as you move forward. They’re also there to help you prepare important paperwork, such as potential restraining orders, and to connect you with local resources like counseling services, support groups, or other information. Your advocate will ensure that your voice is heard, your needs are respected, and your choices are honored.
- How many times will I have to tell my story? This is a big concern for many survivors and we understand why. Retelling your story is often re-traumatizing. Our goal is to minimize how many times you have to go through it and there will likely be some time between when you share it with us initially and when you may have to repeat it. Our victim advocate is there to ensure you won’t have to tell your story needlessly and is available to support you throughout.
- How involved do I have to be? It’s completely up to you. Some survivors want to know every detail and be part of every decision. Others prefer only to hear from us when absolutely necessary. You can choose the level of involvement that feels right for you.
- Will I face judgement or shame? Our sex abuse team understands that trauma can impact people in many ways—mental health struggles, difficulties at work, challenges in relationships, or coping behaviors like drinking or drug use. There is no shame in that. We aim to take a holistic approach to each individual situation and if you need help beyond the case itself, such as counseling or financial resources, our victim advocate is there to connect you with the services you feel may be right for you. Our role is to support you, not judge you.
- Can my name be kept confidential? Many people considering legal action against a sex abuser worry about who else might find out. If you’d prefer to remain anonymous, we will certainly keep your confidentiality. In Massachusetts, we can file cases using pseudonyms (like “Jane Doe”) and while the accused will know your name, it won’t be made public. Even when multiple survivors are part of the same lawsuit, plaintiffs won’t know each other’s identities unless they choose to connect. We also take extra care to make any necessary court documents trauma-sensitive, avoiding unnecessary details that could potentially identify you. We’ll always review these filings with you before they are submitted to ensure you feel comfortable and are part of the process in every way you want to be.
- How quickly do I have to decide if I want to move forward? Aside from the statute of limitations, the timeline is yours to set. If the statute of limitations is close, we might encourage you to file simply to preserve the statute, since this may be the only opportunity you have to file your case. After that, you set the pace. At each stage, whether requesting medical records, sending a demand letter, or filing a case, you’ll decide if and when you feel ready to move forward.
- Will I have to face the person I’m accusing? This is a very common fear and although every case is different, we’ll protect you as much as possible. If a case goes to trial, the accused does have the right to be in the courtroom but you will never be closer than that. Sexual abuse cases often resolve before a deposition is required, however, if necessary, we would arrange things so you don’t have to be in the same room during questioning. And you will never go through this alone: someone from your legal team or your victim advocate (or both) will be by your side.
- Will I be cross-examined? The very idea of being questioned can feel overwhelming and scary, and truthfully, a deposition can be painful and frustrating. But it can also be empowering. Many survivors describe finding their voice and the strength to finally be able to say, “this is my story and this is the terrible thing someone did to me.” We have seen clients come out of the experience with a renewed sense of purpose and a steely resolve to bring the perpetrator to justice. Not all cases require a deposition or trial, but if yours does, we’ll prepare you carefully and stand with you every step of the way.
- Do I have to file a criminal case? Civil and criminal cases are separate, and the choice is yours. A criminal case involves bringing your complaint to the police and many survivors of sexual abuse don’t feel comfortable doing so. You can certainly pursue a civil case without filing a criminal one. While you may be asked why you didn’t go to the police when the incident occurred, there may be many valid reasons why and we’ll help you share your story in a way that feels comfortable. To the extent you may also be involved in an ongoing criminal case, we will be there, as your civil attorneys, to make sure that your rights are protected.
Contact a Compassionate Sex Abuse Attorney Today
The decision to pursue a legal case against an abuser is never an easy one. If you have been the victim of physician sexual abuse, school sexual abuse, or sexual abuse while attending a Residential Treatment Facility, we encourage you to take the important first step to contact us at (800) 451-4471 for a free, confidential, no-obligation discussion about possible legal action.
At Shepard O’Donnell, our sex abuse attorneys represent both women and men who are looking to hold perpetrators, and the institutions that employ(ed) them, accountable for their reprehensible actions. We would be glad to explain what’s involved in the process of filing a claim and answer any additional questions you may have.
We are committed to protecting your confidentiality and ensuring that you feel safe and supported throughout the legal process. Your healing, your rights, and your story are important, not just as a legal case, but as a person who matters.
Read more about our approach to working with sexual abuse survivors.
How to Protect Your Child Athlete From Abuse This Summer
Today, many parents are going the extra mile to give their kids every chance to succeed, especially in sports. From private coaching to elite summer camps, the drive to gain a competitive edge often begins early. Sports like baseball, hockey, tennis, and gymnastics now demand year-round commitment and intensive training to reach the highest levels. For many families, these programs represent more than just skill development, they’re often seen as stepping stones to college scholarships or even professional careers.
It’s no surprise, then, that some parents are investing in top-tier summer programs for their young athletes. However, with the proliferation of these programs comes the need for increased vigilance around who is running them. Whether it’s a summer league, sleepaway camp, a weekend tournament, or one-on-one training sessions, these activities can place kids in unsupervised or semi-supervised settings with adult trainers and coaches who are often relative strangers. Even if they are people you think you know well, having proactive conversations with your child about what constitutes abuse and what to do if they encounter it can not only help prevent harm but also empower your child to speak up if something feels wrong.
It’s not about being fearful, it’s about being informed. You are placing trust in trainers, camp staff, drivers, chaperones, and team doctors to care for your child in your absence. The unfortunate truth is that, while these adults are there to coach your child and support their athletic development, they also have the potential to cross boundaries and abuse that trust.
What Constitutes Child Abuse in Sports?
According to mass.gov, child abuse is “the non-accidental commission of any act by a caretaker upon a child under age 18 which causes or creates a substantial risk of physical or emotional injury or constitutes a sexual offense under the laws of the Commonwealth or any sexual contact between a caretaker and a child under the care of that individual.” Abuse in youth sports is rooted in the inherent power dynamic between athletes and coaches, making young athletes vulnerable to all forms of abuse. And when the team is winning, or the child is excelling, questions and concerns tend to be pushed aside. Child abuse in sports can take many forms, including:
- Physical abuse
- Emotional and psychological abuse
- Bullying, including physical, verbal, emotional, and cyberbullying
- Harassment and hazing
- Sexual abuse
- Grooming
What is Grooming?
In order to keep children and young people safe, it’s important to understand the concept of grooming. Grooming is a deliberate process where an abuser builds trust with a child and/or their family in order to facilitate sexual abuse, and can happen in person or online. The U.S. Center for SafeSport warns that since grooming involves manipulation, it can be hard to tell the difference between the actions of a caring adult and one who is grooming your child for abuse. Some telltale signs of grooming could include creating opportunities to be alone with your child; getting close to them by acting like a friend, instead of a coach; insisting on physical contact such as hugging or touching; communicating in secret online, or offering private lessons, gifts, or privileges no one else gets. Parents will sometimes ignore these warning signs in the mistaken belief that this means their child has exceptional talent that the coach or other staff member wants to develop. Recent allegations made by Alex Cooper of the popular podcast Call Her Alex, against a BU soccer coach claim this type of grooming behavior.
Most child sexual abuse or grooming is perpetrated in isolated, one-on-one situations. While child sexual abuse often occurs after or alongside grooming, abuse does not always take place. Similarly, perpetrators can also sexually abuse a child without grooming them beforehand. We encourage you to have ongoing, age-appropriate conversations with your children about personal safety, boundaries, and what to do if something doesn’t feel right (see the resources listed below).
How Can You Protect Your Child From Sexual Abuse in Sports?
While laws like the SafeSport Act are a valid attempt to keep kids safer, you know your child best. Watch their mood, look for changes in behavior, and monitor their attitude in relation to the sport to determine if something might be wrong. Try to be as involved in the organization as possible so you can monitor what goes on. Since predatory behavior usually builds over time, you, as a parent, can watch for unusual coaching behavior to try to catch abuse before it starts. Bullying at games, angry outbursts, inappropriate flirting between players and staff, or coaches who encourage excessive hugging or physical contact are all red flags. Whether it’s for your town’s summer league or an out-of-town skills camp, there are a few additional steps you can take to keep your child safe from sexual abuse:
- Make sure everyone associated with the program has had background checks
- Ask about the organization’s abuse prevention policies, like those in the Minor Athlete Abuse Prevention Policies (MAAPP)
- Ask whether and how often staff are required to have training on how to spot and report abuse
- Ask to see abuse prevention policies and procedures
- Ask to be copied on all communication with your child
- Check in with your child regularly to make sure they’re still enjoying the sport
- Help your child set boundaries and empower them to say “no”
- Teach your child never to be alone with another adult
- Speak up when you see concerning behavior from coaches, volunteers, administrators, or older teenagers
- Set guidelines for local and overnight travel, and make sure your child is comfortable with everything and everyone involved
Above all, keep lines of communication open—with your child, your child’s coaches, and other parents. Let your child know that they can tell you or another trusted adult if something is wrong, that you will always believe them, and that they should never keep secrets from you.
Contact an Experienced Sexual Abuse Attorney
Participating in youth sports has many benefits, and we hope you and your child have a positive experience this summer and beyond. If you have any questions or need to speak with an experienced sexual abuse attorney, call us for a free, confidential conversation. Our compassionate legal team works with survivors of child sexual abuse, and our in-house victim advocate is available to provide a safe, non-judgemental space in which to process what has happened. From your first conversation with us, you’ll have someone by your side who understands the emotional toll of trauma and is there to offer guidance, comfort, and practical support.
Resources
- Mass.gov Warning Signs of Child Abuse and Neglect
- U.S. Center for SafeSport Emotional and Physical Abuse and Misconduct Toolkit
- National Center for Missing & Exploited Children’s Safe to Compete website
- Safe to Compete Discussion Guide: Ages 5-10
- Safe to Compete Discussion Guide: Ages 11-17
- Safe to Compete Tips for Protecting Child Athletes from Sexual Abuse
How Can a Victim Advocate Help You?
Experiencing a violent crime—especially sexual abuse or assault—can leave deep emotional and psychological wounds. Survivors often face a complex and overwhelming path to healing and justice, going through a range of difficult emotions on their road to recovery. You don’t have to navigate that path alone. A victim’s advocate is someone who walks beside you, offering support, guidance, and compassion every step of the way.
Victim advocates are trained professionals who provide a safe, nonjudgmental space where you can begin to process what’s happened. They’re here to listen, to help you understand your rights, and to make sure you feel empowered and informed as you move forward—at your own pace.
A Voice For Victims
In the aftermath of a traumatic experience, many survivors feel overwhelmed by fear, uncertainty, or the belief that no one will truly understand or believe what they’ve been through. A victim advocate stands alongside you, not to speak for you, but to help you feel strong enough to speak for yourself.
Advocates understand how difficult it can be to relive painful events, especially in intimidating environments like police interviews, legal proceedings, or courtroom hearings. They help you organize your thoughts, remember key details, and feel prepared for whatever step comes next. If you’re unsure about whether to take legal action, your advocate can offer clarity so you can make choices that feel right for you.
Most importantly, they remind you that you are not alone. Your voice deserves to be heard, and your experience deserves to be acknowledged with empathy, respect, and dignity.
A Caring Ally
A victim advocate can help you understand your legal rights and explain your options in clear, simple terms. They can guide you through each stage of the justice system, from reporting a crime, to navigating complex procedures, and even attending hearings and other important meetings with you, all while keeping your well-being front and center.
They’re also there to help you prepare important paperwork, such as restraining orders, and to connect you with local resources like counseling services, support groups, or other information. Your advocate will ensure that your voice is heard, your needs are respected, and your choices are honored.
Our In-House Victim Advocate
At Shepard O’Donnell, we know how difficult it can be to come forward with a sexual abuse claim. That’s why our legal team includes a dedicated in-house victim advocate. From your first conversation with us, you’ll have someone by your side who understands the emotional toll of trauma and is there to offer guidance, comfort, and practical support.
If you have been the victim of physician sexual abuse, school sexual abuse, or sexual abuse while attending a Residential Treatment Facility, we encourage you to take the important first step in holding your abuser accountable. Contact us at (800) 451-4471 for a free, confidential, no-obligation discussion about possible legal action. We would be glad to explain what’s involved in the process of filing a claim. Read more about our approach to working with sexual abuse survivors in our blog.
We are committed to protecting your confidentiality and ensuring that you feel safe and supported throughout the legal process. Your healing, your rights, and your story are important, not just as a legal case, but as a person who matters.
Are You Considering Filing Physician or Educator Sexual Abuse Charges? We Have Your Back.
We understand that coming forward in a sexual abuse case and pursuing legal action is one of the most difficult and painful experiences anyone can go through. We applaud your bravery.
If you are a victim of physician or educator sexual abuse or sexual assault, you may feel confused, embarrassed or ashamed and we know that you may be hesitant to share your experience. Our place is not to judge. We are here to listen to your story and answer any questions you may have about the process of filing a claim, what happens next and what is involved in moving a lawsuit forward. You will not have to pay us out-of-pocket for any confidential conversations or our legal services.
When you decide the time is right for you to pursue legal action, we are here to help you understand your options and choose the one that’s right for you. We pursue civil actions against the individuals involved, as well as the affiliated institutions that failed to prevent or stop the abusive behavior. You will speak with a female attorney who is empathetic, compassionate and experienced in working with victims of trauma. Together, we will determine your comfort level and where we go from here.
“One of the most important things I can do for victims of sexual abuse is to listen to their experience and support them through the process,” says attorney Erika O’Donnell. “Whether they are ready to fight, or want to proceed at a more cautious pace, I will meet them where they are. My job is to be by their side while we seek justice for their life-changing trauma.”
If you choose Shepard O’Donnell as your legal partner to hold those individuals who flagrantly breached your trust accountable for their actions, you will work with the same attorney for the duration of your case. While some firms might pass you around a team of lawyers, we value your privacy and understand that a single point of contact can be comforting. Whether you prefer virtual or in-person meetings, or if you’d rather text or call, we will tailor our communication to fit your needs.
We are empathetic yet fierce defenders of your honor and promise to do everything in our power to hold sexual offenders, and the institutions that employed them, accountable for the harm they’ve inflicted. At this time, we are actively evaluating claims of sexual abuse against Dr. Richard Kauff and Dr. Derrick Todd.
Please call us at (800) 451-4471 if you’d like to have a confidential, no obligation conversation about filing a potential physician sexual abuse lawsuit. We are here to help.